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12 August 2005 - 13:47 There have been a few wierd things going down. I have developed cravings. Things I absolutely must have or do. 1) I ABSOLUTELY MUST watch the entire first season of Twin Peaks again. There is no rational behind it. I think I just want to see Agent Cooper praise his coffee and see BOB creep into Laura's room again. Is that wierd?? 2) I ABSOLUTELY MUST own a keyboard. As in a musical electric piano. For recording purposes y'see. I find myself trawling across e-bay with left hand holding right hand back so I don't make silly offers. Sounds easy? Not so much. 3) I ABSOLUTELY MUST lose a few pounds. Right now. Without changing my lifestyle in any WAY! But knowing that that is unlikely to work. I must absolutely have an elliptical trainer. It's the ONLY POSSIBLE WAY. Plus, from what I know of my friends who have one - it makes a great clothes horse. 4) I ABSOLUTELY MUST have a ticket to the Habs home opener on the 11th August. No questions. Even the thought of not having one may send me into wild fits of uncontrollable (and potentially murderous) rage. I'm serious. You want to make me believe that I'm going. 5) I ABSOLUTELY MUST play golf soon. I'm getting itchy and twiddly fingers. Plus watching lefty rip it up at the PGA Championship is driving me nuts! And dammit if I didn't get an invitation for next Friday?? Dammit!! Cuz I know I can't make it. Cravings. All of them. Maybe I just need to drink more milk or something. Now then... It seems that weddings are expensive. So far we've our venue options are as follows: Au Lion D'Or in Orford... which is cute but with no real grounds to speak of. Manoir des Sables in Magog which may be a bit too much of a business conference kind of place... BUT it DOES have a golf course. See above. Ripplecove Inn, which is probably the prettiest of the lot, but hellexpensive. And we'd probably need to hire the entire place, which - bearing in mind that rooms go for something along the lines of $200 each (and there are 35 of them)...eeeech. Still this is where the 'N-E-G-O-T-I-A-T-I-O-N' skills come in handy, although I wonder if just being stompy and emotional might do the trick. Picture, if you will, the following scenario... Cruel Venue Manager: "OK Mr P. To have the day you want - the price will be approximately $1,000,000. And in order to secure this, you must sever your left testicle as collateral." P (stomping and hrumphing): "My left testicle? But that's my only good one" (wait was that too much information)..."Won't you consider a couple of fingers and perhaps an earlobe?" Compassionate Venue Manager: "OK - a couple of fingers and a lobe will do" P (with thumbs up towards camera): "STEAL!!". The end.
   My life is rated NC-17. What is your life rated? |
